Description

Arrrrrrrggghhhhh!!!. I admit it. It’s not the best start to a review but Christ on a bike it’s what I honestly thought as I stared, increasingly goggle eyed at the appalling schmaltz-fest that is “Beautiful Lovesongs”. Love songs they maybe in that they are about love …but beautiful? There is more beauty in a slag heap used as a nuclear waste dumping site surrounded by a moat of dog excrement than there is on this album. Actually that’s not entirely fair. All the steam coming out of my ears must be clouding my vision. Nilssons “Without You” is amore… great song and they could have gone for that excruciating Mariah Carey abomination so that’s something I suppose. D C Lee “See The Day” is fine and so is the Gladys Knight number while “Torn “ is a terrific pop song and Natalie Imbruglia is a real honey. Sorry lost my objectivity for a moment there.” Sexual Healing “is a classic of course, though I would question it’s labelling as a love song. Most of the stuff here however lamentable is about romance and soft focus. That’s about lust and sweaty close ups. Maria McKee is a brilliant singer/songwriter as well although the chosen song for this “Show Me Heaven” is not her finest hour. “To Miss Someone” off her superb debut album is a devastatingly moving love song but choosing that or indeed anything in the entire musical canon with any artistic merit would require real imagination and taste wouldn’t it?Not that the target audience for this drek will possess any taste mind. The sort of drooling cadavers with sponge pudding where their brain should be who slavishly lap up everything popular culture lazily hurls at them with out ever asking, not once in their slovenly lives: “Is there more?” My solution of nailing them all to Westlife CD, s coated in wire wool is apparently illegal so that’s why I’m resorting to writing this. In the hope, undoubtedly forlorn like, that some of these amoebas will read it and realise that there really is more to life than Ana- bloody- Stascia and Maroon 5. I’m helpful like that me, and of course should I ever snap and carry out my violent solution I can tell the authorities I attempted a peaceful solution and claim provocation.Talking of which. Will Young……there is no excuse to encourage the alligator jawed fraud with his ghastly dripping heavy eye lidded sincerity and bottom lip trembling vocals . Westlife should off course be tortured with horrible sharp pointy things and pipettes filled with Napalm. As for G4, there is never a pack of ravenous wolves when you need one which is usually as G4 are about to open their appalling flapping gobs. Charlotte Church should never be forgiven for releasing an album called “Tissues and Issues”. No scrub that. Charlotte Church should never be forgiven for releasing an album at all. Lee Ryan ….someone inform the taste Police. Bryan McFadden and Delta forget the taste police ,just get them blokes out of “Terminal Force” .Must get a grip I’m starting to scare the kids (Come to think of it, they look pretty scared most of the time) If record companies must release compilations of this nature Lets see them use some imagination. “Northern Sky” by Nick Drake, “Downtown Lights” by the Blue Nile , “To Keep Your heart Whole” by The Trembling Blue Stars, “Parade “ by White and Torch” , “Blue and Grey Shirt” by American Music Club, “Blinder by The Hour “ by The Triffids, “Joy” by Isaac Hayes “I Don,t Beleive In The Sun“ by the Magnetic Fields….Truly monumental songs that p*** over anything on this lamentable affair from colossal heights ….I Know , I know it won’t sell… they would say But how do you know if you don’t try. The people are waiting .You never know some might not have stodgy dessert where their grey thinking organ should be. Some could have fruit salad and you could really get their juices flowing.

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Info:

Category:

Music > Collections

Case Type:

CD

Release Type:

Retail

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Cover Info:

Title:

Beautiful Lovesongs (2006) Retail CD

Part:

Front

Dimensions:

1418 x 1427 px

Size:

734 KB

Downloads:

215 (0 today)

Uploaded:

Report a Problem Wrong Cover Duplicate Image Bad Quality Wrong Info

23/01/07 by allcdcovers

Quality Rating:

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Rated 4 of 5 (1 votes). Click CDs to vote!

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